I got myself a twofer today. In an effort to be frugal since I splurged on my brakes, I strolled over to the local Subway for a tasty, healthy, low calorie, low cost lunch. Well, kinda. I walk in about 4 seconds before 2 DHL workers in very vibrant red and yellow fleece come in and join me. We are the only customers, and one of the drivers was quite verbose. He gets the full run down on which subs are $5 footlongs.
DHL: Which ones are $5?
THEM: Pretty much all of them, except your "premium" subs, but the chicken bacon is $5, so is the chicken teriyaki, the BMT...
I don't really care about what else he said, I may have even gotten some of the sub names wrong. In any event, DHL guy #1 orders the Chicken Teriyaki. I don't even get upset that he skips me in line.
ME: I'll have a footlong turkey/bacon please.
THEM: Footlong chicken bacon?
Does chicken sound like turkey? Ever?
ME: No, turkey bacon.
THEM: Oh ok, footlong turkey with bacon.
THEM: Footlong chicken bacon?
There is foreshadowing here, I promise I'm not trying to bore you with the details of my sandwich.
Footlong assembly continues, and the final assembly, including the healthy application of Jared's extra salty microwaved bacon strips, is pawned off to the #2 of this particular Subway. It looks delicious. I'm ready to go.
THEM #2: You want to make that a combo?
ME: The sandwich is $5 right?
THEM #2: Yes. You want a combo?
ME: How much is a combo?
THEM #2: $2.49
ME: No thanks, I just take the sandwich.
I stand there with a $5 and a $1 in my hand, guessing there is sales tax on my $5 footlong.
THEM #2: $6.57 please.
I nearly shit my pants from the shock. $5...times 1.06...equals $5.30, right?
ME: I thought the sandwich was $5?
THEM #2: It is.
ME: So how do you get to $6.57?
THEM #2: Umm the bacon.
ME: How much is the bacon?
THEM #2: $1.20.
ME: Per pound?
ME (at THEM #1): So the chicken bacon is $5 but the turkey bacon is not?
They nod at me with mutual annoyance. I place the same $6 I've been holding ready on the counter and expect a receipt.
THEM #2: $6.57 please.
He's not happy. I think he thought I was trying to bid him down. In truth, I'm just a retard when it comes to paying with cash because I'm so used to swiping plastic. So I quickly admitted I was wrong and added a dollar to my contribution. I left perplexed that my four little strips of fatty pork increased the cost of my sandwich by around 30%. I could have asked him to put 300 black olives and an entire red onion on the thing and the price would have been completely unchanged. But pork....nooo....pork is pricey. That's cool, I can handle a $6 footlong, but the commercial just won't be as catchy.
And why the fuck did he tell me it was $5 right before he rang it up?
Friday, February 13, 2009
Can I try this on?
So I broke down and got my brakes done by the local Chrysler dealer. While I was waiting, I decided to go be "shopportunistic" as they call it, at Marshall's which is right down the street. I guess I figured if I were going to pay full price for brakes, I should try and find some clothes at rock-bottom prices. I manage to find a fairly priced "name brand" shirt that I wanted to try on.
I go to the fitting rooms carrying two long-sleeve Under Armour shirts, and this one button down shirt.
THEM: You can try those on, but you can't try that on (points to buttondown shirt).
ME: Um, I don't want to try these on (UA), I know they fit. I want to try this button down shirt on before I buy it, I might want a different size.
THEM: Well, see, this have the tag. I cannot take off the tag, so you can't open it.
I should probably have mentioned that it was not on a hanger, but all folded and pinned up in a plastic bag with all sorts of collar support, etc.
ME: So why would I buy it then if I can't try it on?
THEM: Oh is ok - you can return. No problem. Try on at home and return. Is ok.
I don't really know how to type with an accent, but if you can't tell, English was not the first language.
ME: So I can buy it, take it home, try it on, and then return it?
THEM: Yes, is ok, no prolem, you return.
Right about now is when I start to lose my shit.
ME: Wait a minute. It's ok to buy it, open it, put it on, and then bring it back if it doesn't fit? But I can't just try it on here? Really?
THEM: Yes yes. See? It have the tag. I cannot remove the tag (referencing security/anti-theft/indestructible plastic tag attached to the shirt through the bag).
ME: Ok, so if I want to I can go buy it, and then just come back here and try it on?
THEM: Yes. You need to buy to take off the tag.
ME: Does that really make sense to you?
Trust me, I don't know why I bother reasoning, but I can't help it.
THEM: .....
ME: Ok, how about I go over to the counter and just ask her to remove the tag so I can try it on?
THEM: Ah...yes, you can go ask. She maybe remove the tag.
So in closing, I must not have looked threatening enough to attempt to steal the shirt, and I got the tag removed and got to try it on. But really, if I weren't such an asshole, do they just expect me to buy it, GO HOME to try it on, and then return it if it doesn't fit? C'mon, admit you're wrong Marshall's!
PS - it fit, and I bought it in case you were wondering.
I go to the fitting rooms carrying two long-sleeve Under Armour shirts, and this one button down shirt.
THEM: You can try those on, but you can't try that on (points to buttondown shirt).
ME: Um, I don't want to try these on (UA), I know they fit. I want to try this button down shirt on before I buy it, I might want a different size.
THEM: Well, see, this have the tag. I cannot take off the tag, so you can't open it.
I should probably have mentioned that it was not on a hanger, but all folded and pinned up in a plastic bag with all sorts of collar support, etc.
ME: So why would I buy it then if I can't try it on?
THEM: Oh is ok - you can return. No problem. Try on at home and return. Is ok.
I don't really know how to type with an accent, but if you can't tell, English was not the first language.
ME: So I can buy it, take it home, try it on, and then return it?
THEM: Yes, is ok, no prolem, you return.
Right about now is when I start to lose my shit.
ME: Wait a minute. It's ok to buy it, open it, put it on, and then bring it back if it doesn't fit? But I can't just try it on here? Really?
THEM: Yes yes. See? It have the tag. I cannot remove the tag (referencing security/anti-theft/indestructible plastic tag attached to the shirt through the bag).
ME: Ok, so if I want to I can go buy it, and then just come back here and try it on?
THEM: Yes. You need to buy to take off the tag.
ME: Does that really make sense to you?
Trust me, I don't know why I bother reasoning, but I can't help it.
THEM: .....
ME: Ok, how about I go over to the counter and just ask her to remove the tag so I can try it on?
THEM: Ah...yes, you can go ask. She maybe remove the tag.
So in closing, I must not have looked threatening enough to attempt to steal the shirt, and I got the tag removed and got to try it on. But really, if I weren't such an asshole, do they just expect me to buy it, GO HOME to try it on, and then return it if it doesn't fit? C'mon, admit you're wrong Marshall's!
PS - it fit, and I bought it in case you were wondering.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Dublin, Cayman Islands?
This is a classic, perhaps the diatribe that made me want to start this blog. One might even consider it epic. The background:
A hedge fund I worked for was waiting for a check to come in for a bond that matured. As goes the life of a hedge fund, it was shutting down, and while I was working in Greenwich, CT, the fund actually existed in the Cayman Islands, and the administrator that made sure we weren't pulling a "Madoff" was in Dublin (guess which country, or just read on). We hadn't seen the check yet, so it was time to check with the custodian bank. And so it goes...
THEM: The position was cashed out and checks have been issued. At this time the check has not been cashed and are still outstanding. The checks have been sent to the address on file and if this information needs to updated please send the following:
1. Letter of instructions on company letterhead with detailed instructions, Medallion Guarantee signed by the authorized officer.
2. Corporate Resolution showing authorized officer
-Is it just me, or is she already admitting that the address may be wrong? Foreshadowing perhaps?
ME: Please confirm the amount of the check and the address to which it was sent so that I may keep an eye out for it or request that it be forwarded if sent to a satellite office.
THEM: The amount of the check was for $123,456.78 made payable to Fake Name Hedge Fund. The check was sent to the following address effective 11/30/2006: Random Square, Shamrock's Hill, Dublin 2 Cayman Islands.
I hope that is of some assistance. If you have any further questions please let me know. Thank you
-sorry, have to hide the actual fund name and address, except for the part in bold, which is what this little story is all about. Houston, New York - we have a problem...
ME: Random Square, Dublin 2 is in Ireland, not the Cayman Islands. This needs to be resolved immediately. I can understand if you need authorization letters to change to the management company address in the US, however, I find it reasonable to ask that you re-send the check to the same address, only amending to the proper country, without any further such documentation than this email. That is the address of our former administrator, who can forward us the check upon receipt. Obviously, they cannot do this if the check goes to the Cayman Islands.
- I know, I sound lazy. I didn't want to do the paperwork, nor did I want to chase the people that would have to facilitate said paperwork. Besides, it's a minor amendment, right? Any reasonable human being would say so and make the correction, I think...
THEM: That is the address that is on the account since 2003. For updating even just the country under the address I still would need a letter of instructions stating what the correct information would be. The letter would need to be signed by an authorized officer and Medallion guarantee.
I understand that this might be a inconvenience but for me to request any information or reissuance of the check to the correct address I would need the letter for confirmation.
- I'm no longer at the point that I agree that this person is qualified to use the term "I understand."
ME: The address you have is completely invalid. Anybody who looks at a map will see that there is no Dublin in the Cayman Islands. I realize that in 2003 a form must have been completed incorrectly, but the request you are making is more than just an inconvenience. We are dissolving as a company, and a fund, and the authorized officers and resolutions are not up to date, as departures have been made from the firm and no full time employees remain, myself included. The check being sent is still being made out to the same party, Fake Name Hedge Fund, LTD, and therefore can only be cashed once that entity receives it. Surely you understand that the banks persistence in this matter is causing us not only a loss in collected interest (instead collected by the bank, in their favor), but also a strain and cost burden is being placed on Fake Name Hedge Fund due to a minor typographical error. Please speak to your manager or whoever needs to make this decision to simply correct the address to one that is geographically applicable to an address located on Earth as recognized by the majority of civilized human beings that inhabit it. Otherwise, we lack the choices and the resources to do anything but claim the lost interest at $77/day (approx) plus administration fees associated with preparing the necessary paperwork.
I appreciate your understanding in this matter and look forward to hearing that a check has been re-issued and sent to Dublin, Ireland.
- I know, I'm being an asshole again. I have other things to worry about and no more patience for ineptitude (if I had any to begin with). The interest claim is a total bluff, but it's possible that it is an amount greater than or equal to the salary of the martian I'm apparently dealing with, so it could be perceived as a threateningly high amount. I guess I was going for the "if they claim interest for an amount higher than they pay me for not doing my job as efficiently as I could, they might fire me. Ok, I'll amend the address and send a new check." jedi mind trick response. No such luck...
THEM: At this time the address that the bank has on file was set up in 2003 and paperwork has been sent to that address with nothing being returned to the bank. The book entry statement that you forwarded to me in October also shows the address that we have on file. I understand that what the Bank of [Density] is requesting could be a inconvenience, but at this time for any changes to be made under this account the bank needs a letter of instructions (This is protocol and per SEC regulations). Only the registered holder can effect changes on the account. I have spoken to my manager regarding the issue and for any changes to be made he stated what I have told you already. The Bank of [Density] would need a letter of instructions signed by a authorized officer with a medallion guarantee.
- I changed the Bank name, obviously. You would have realized that if you were reading what I wrote, just as she would have realized that Dublin is NOT in the Cayman Islands if she had read what I wrote. Apparently, using the same answer worded a different way is a tactic they teach for dispute resolution at the Bank of [Density]. Since I still don't have a check, and still don't want to medallion guarantee anything at all, the diatribe continues. You might even say it escalates...
Oh, and ask Harry Markopolos what he thinks of SEC protocol.
ME: I continue to not understand. The mere fact that you have received nothing back from what has been sent to an obviously incorrect country label should be reason enough. I cannot believe that the bank does not have the discretion to adjust an address from "Cayman Islands" where there is no Dublin, to "Ireland" where Dublin is not only synonymous with the country, but also home to one of the largest fund administrators in the world. You are basically telling me that the SEC does not allow you to stop putting a square peg in a round hole without written authorization that the square peg goes in the square hole. At least give me the acknowledgment that you concur that the address you have on file is completely erroneous.
- At this point I'm just begging her to accept the fact that the check went nowhere, protocol be damned. Just tell me you agree, admit you're wrong, and we'll work on what your boss is telling you you have to do. Not surprisingly, this tactic failed, and communication stopped.
ME (12 days later): Please respond or provide a manager that I can speak with.
- I'm not really sure what made me think that if she didn't respond, she would instead provide me with the name of her superior. Looks like a stupid move in hindsight, but I had no check, and no other contact route to take. I continued on with my "other" full-time job and left it alone for nearly two months.
ME: Has there been any progress on this matter? Fake Name Fund is still awaiting the payment they are due. Please provide a form if necessary to change the mailing address for the distribution as it is now obvious that sending something to Dublin in the Cayman Islands was completely futile. Please also stop payment on the original check before it falls into the wrong hands and is erroneously deposited.
Also, please provide a contact that I can speak to regarding an interest claim resulting from this bottleneck in the process.
- I'm feigning defeat. I'm also still threatening that erroneous interest claim. Lastly, I must have watched "Wedding Crashers" recently as that's the second time I've used the word "erroneous."
ME (another month later): Please provide a response immediately.
- I'm starting to think I'll never get the check. Out of the blue, a manager of some sort chimes in and decides to flex some muscle.
THEM: Any changes in the address field must come from the holder (PROTOCOL). Regardless of how you personally view this issue, the holder still has to update the address with a written correspondence. Remember that we have presented the issue to the change of address group to no avail. The holder has been receiving correspondence from Bank of [Density] since the bond was issued on 5/21/02. Please have the customer submit the letter so we can move forward.
- I don't remember presenting anything to the "change of address group" or even knowing such a group exists. Now he's lying to me, and putting things in capital letters, and still thinking that Dublin not being in the Cayman Islands is a matter of opinion. Let's get this guy on the phone and try and make sense out of it.
ME: I tried your phone # below and was told that "all circuits were busy." In any event, this matter is very simple. The address you have on file is nothing more than INVALID. This is not my personal opinion this is a fact. There is no Dublin in the Cayman Islands. You have issued a check to an invalid address and as such it remains uncashed and at risk of being deposited by somebody other than the intended recipient (FRAUD). I have asked repeatedly to have this corrected. I do not understand whom you are referring to when you say "the customer" as I am representing Fake Name Hedge Fund and am as such fully responsible for making sure the payment is received. Please tell me specifically what request you need in order to fulfill your protocol and amend to a valid address.
- OK, so calling him didn't work, that means I have no choice but to also put things in (parenthesized) capital letters and give a geography lesson. Then, fine, I'll do it your way, I guess. Maybe. But please just admit you're wrong!
THEM: The bond was issued in 2002. I understand that the address on file is obviously wrong. However, any changes in the address field has to come from the holder after 5 years of bond issuance. We need a letter in our files indicating that you affected the change of address. The holder also has an obligation to bring to Bank Of [Density]’s attention any discrepancies at the time of bond issuance.
- YES! Victory! Obviously wrong! We can now move on, right?
ME: This charade has gone on long enough. This query started in October of 2006 - within 5 years of any month in 2002, no matter how you do the math. I need you to do 2 things:
1) Stop payment on the check that was sent to Dublin, Cayman Islands.
2) Send me the required documentation that needs to be completed in order to get a check issued to an address that's actually on a map.
Please urgently comply with my request so we can finalize this matter.
See how easy that was? Just admit you're wrong and I'm happy to comply :)
A hedge fund I worked for was waiting for a check to come in for a bond that matured. As goes the life of a hedge fund, it was shutting down, and while I was working in Greenwich, CT, the fund actually existed in the Cayman Islands, and the administrator that made sure we weren't pulling a "Madoff" was in Dublin (guess which country, or just read on). We hadn't seen the check yet, so it was time to check with the custodian bank. And so it goes...
THEM: The position was cashed out and checks have been issued. At this time the check has not been cashed and are still outstanding. The checks have been sent to the address on file and if this information needs to updated please send the following:
1. Letter of instructions on company letterhead with detailed instructions, Medallion Guarantee signed by the authorized officer.
2. Corporate Resolution showing authorized officer
-Is it just me, or is she already admitting that the address may be wrong? Foreshadowing perhaps?
ME: Please confirm the amount of the check and the address to which it was sent so that I may keep an eye out for it or request that it be forwarded if sent to a satellite office.
THEM: The amount of the check was for $123,456.78 made payable to Fake Name Hedge Fund. The check was sent to the following address effective 11/30/2006: Random Square, Shamrock's Hill, Dublin 2 Cayman Islands.
I hope that is of some assistance. If you have any further questions please let me know. Thank you
-sorry, have to hide the actual fund name and address, except for the part in bold, which is what this little story is all about. Houston, New York - we have a problem...
ME: Random Square, Dublin 2 is in Ireland, not the Cayman Islands. This needs to be resolved immediately. I can understand if you need authorization letters to change to the management company address in the US, however, I find it reasonable to ask that you re-send the check to the same address, only amending to the proper country, without any further such documentation than this email. That is the address of our former administrator, who can forward us the check upon receipt. Obviously, they cannot do this if the check goes to the Cayman Islands.
- I know, I sound lazy. I didn't want to do the paperwork, nor did I want to chase the people that would have to facilitate said paperwork. Besides, it's a minor amendment, right? Any reasonable human being would say so and make the correction, I think...
THEM: That is the address that is on the account since 2003. For updating even just the country under the address I still would need a letter of instructions stating what the correct information would be. The letter would need to be signed by an authorized officer and Medallion guarantee.
I understand that this might be a inconvenience but for me to request any information or reissuance of the check to the correct address I would need the letter for confirmation.
- I'm no longer at the point that I agree that this person is qualified to use the term "I understand."
ME: The address you have is completely invalid. Anybody who looks at a map will see that there is no Dublin in the Cayman Islands. I realize that in 2003 a form must have been completed incorrectly, but the request you are making is more than just an inconvenience. We are dissolving as a company, and a fund, and the authorized officers and resolutions are not up to date, as departures have been made from the firm and no full time employees remain, myself included. The check being sent is still being made out to the same party, Fake Name Hedge Fund, LTD, and therefore can only be cashed once that entity receives it. Surely you understand that the banks persistence in this matter is causing us not only a loss in collected interest (instead collected by the bank, in their favor), but also a strain and cost burden is being placed on Fake Name Hedge Fund due to a minor typographical error. Please speak to your manager or whoever needs to make this decision to simply correct the address to one that is geographically applicable to an address located on Earth as recognized by the majority of civilized human beings that inhabit it. Otherwise, we lack the choices and the resources to do anything but claim the lost interest at $77/day (approx) plus administration fees associated with preparing the necessary paperwork.
I appreciate your understanding in this matter and look forward to hearing that a check has been re-issued and sent to Dublin, Ireland.
- I know, I'm being an asshole again. I have other things to worry about and no more patience for ineptitude (if I had any to begin with). The interest claim is a total bluff, but it's possible that it is an amount greater than or equal to the salary of the martian I'm apparently dealing with, so it could be perceived as a threateningly high amount. I guess I was going for the "if they claim interest for an amount higher than they pay me for not doing my job as efficiently as I could, they might fire me. Ok, I'll amend the address and send a new check." jedi mind trick response. No such luck...
THEM: At this time the address that the bank has on file was set up in 2003 and paperwork has been sent to that address with nothing being returned to the bank. The book entry statement that you forwarded to me in October also shows the address that we have on file. I understand that what the Bank of [Density] is requesting could be a inconvenience, but at this time for any changes to be made under this account the bank needs a letter of instructions (This is protocol and per SEC regulations). Only the registered holder can effect changes on the account. I have spoken to my manager regarding the issue and for any changes to be made he stated what I have told you already. The Bank of [Density] would need a letter of instructions signed by a authorized officer with a medallion guarantee.
- I changed the Bank name, obviously. You would have realized that if you were reading what I wrote, just as she would have realized that Dublin is NOT in the Cayman Islands if she had read what I wrote. Apparently, using the same answer worded a different way is a tactic they teach for dispute resolution at the Bank of [Density]. Since I still don't have a check, and still don't want to medallion guarantee anything at all, the diatribe continues. You might even say it escalates...
Oh, and ask Harry Markopolos what he thinks of SEC protocol.
ME: I continue to not understand. The mere fact that you have received nothing back from what has been sent to an obviously incorrect country label should be reason enough. I cannot believe that the bank does not have the discretion to adjust an address from "Cayman Islands" where there is no Dublin, to "Ireland" where Dublin is not only synonymous with the country, but also home to one of the largest fund administrators in the world. You are basically telling me that the SEC does not allow you to stop putting a square peg in a round hole without written authorization that the square peg goes in the square hole. At least give me the acknowledgment that you concur that the address you have on file is completely erroneous.
- At this point I'm just begging her to accept the fact that the check went nowhere, protocol be damned. Just tell me you agree, admit you're wrong, and we'll work on what your boss is telling you you have to do. Not surprisingly, this tactic failed, and communication stopped.
ME (12 days later): Please respond or provide a manager that I can speak with.
- I'm not really sure what made me think that if she didn't respond, she would instead provide me with the name of her superior. Looks like a stupid move in hindsight, but I had no check, and no other contact route to take. I continued on with my "other" full-time job and left it alone for nearly two months.
ME: Has there been any progress on this matter? Fake Name Fund is still awaiting the payment they are due. Please provide a form if necessary to change the mailing address for the distribution as it is now obvious that sending something to Dublin in the Cayman Islands was completely futile. Please also stop payment on the original check before it falls into the wrong hands and is erroneously deposited.
Also, please provide a contact that I can speak to regarding an interest claim resulting from this bottleneck in the process.
- I'm feigning defeat. I'm also still threatening that erroneous interest claim. Lastly, I must have watched "Wedding Crashers" recently as that's the second time I've used the word "erroneous."
ME (another month later): Please provide a response immediately.
- I'm starting to think I'll never get the check. Out of the blue, a manager of some sort chimes in and decides to flex some muscle.
THEM: Any changes in the address field must come from the holder (PROTOCOL). Regardless of how you personally view this issue, the holder still has to update the address with a written correspondence. Remember that we have presented the issue to the change of address group to no avail. The holder has been receiving correspondence from Bank of [Density] since the bond was issued on 5/21/02. Please have the customer submit the letter so we can move forward.
- I don't remember presenting anything to the "change of address group" or even knowing such a group exists. Now he's lying to me, and putting things in capital letters, and still thinking that Dublin not being in the Cayman Islands is a matter of opinion. Let's get this guy on the phone and try and make sense out of it.
ME: I tried your phone # below and was told that "all circuits were busy." In any event, this matter is very simple. The address you have on file is nothing more than INVALID. This is not my personal opinion this is a fact. There is no Dublin in the Cayman Islands. You have issued a check to an invalid address and as such it remains uncashed and at risk of being deposited by somebody other than the intended recipient (FRAUD). I have asked repeatedly to have this corrected. I do not understand whom you are referring to when you say "the customer" as I am representing Fake Name Hedge Fund and am as such fully responsible for making sure the payment is received. Please tell me specifically what request you need in order to fulfill your protocol and amend to a valid address.
- OK, so calling him didn't work, that means I have no choice but to also put things in (parenthesized) capital letters and give a geography lesson. Then, fine, I'll do it your way, I guess. Maybe. But please just admit you're wrong!
THEM: The bond was issued in 2002. I understand that the address on file is obviously wrong. However, any changes in the address field has to come from the holder after 5 years of bond issuance. We need a letter in our files indicating that you affected the change of address. The holder also has an obligation to bring to Bank Of [Density]’s attention any discrepancies at the time of bond issuance.
- YES! Victory! Obviously wrong! We can now move on, right?
ME: This charade has gone on long enough. This query started in October of 2006 - within 5 years of any month in 2002, no matter how you do the math. I need you to do 2 things:
1) Stop payment on the check that was sent to Dublin, Cayman Islands.
2) Send me the required documentation that needs to be completed in order to get a check issued to an address that's actually on a map.
Please urgently comply with my request so we can finalize this matter.
See how easy that was? Just admit you're wrong and I'm happy to comply :)
Sometimes rude is necessary
My car is old - 133,000 miles, 7 1/2 years old. It's tired, and it needs brakes. I'm cheap, so I look for the best deal I can on brakes. I found a website that sells the OEM Mopar brakes for a guaranteed lowest price - yes! For some reason, I still think my car needs the same brakes that it came with when it was a shiny new machine with 6 miles on the odometer - I don't know why. So I go through the menu prompts: year > make > model > front brakes > brake pads: $120. Hmm, sounds kinda steep for pads, but maybe it's a set for both wheels. Maybe before I order, I should ask how many come in a box. Maybe I'm the only asshole on the planet buying brakes that doesn't know how many pads you get if you just order 1 set. But just because I'm an asshole, doesn't mean you're not an idiot:
ME: need to order new pads and rotors for my 02 PT. Can you confirm that I need to only order a quantity of 1 for the front pads to get a set for both front wheels? I plan to order 2 front rotors and 1 set of pads and I want to be sure I get what I need. I'm guessing that at $120, it's pads for both sides of the car.
- I thought this was a reasonable request, fairly simple, right? Here's the first response:
THEM: Hello, we would need the VIN number to locate this part. Thanks The xxxxmopar Team
- I don't feel the need to expose their name. I also don't see how a VIN number adds value to the question...so I start to get a little annoyed.
ME: VIN number? it's a 2002 PT Cruiser. Front pads quantity 1 includes pads for how many front wheels?
- Yes, I drive a PT Cruiser. Love it or hate it, that's me.
THEM: Sorry, we have requested the vin for proper information, the vin is the vehicle identification number, without that we cannot help you.
- Thanks for clarifying what VIN stands for. Could you also provide me with such elusive facts as what meal comes between breakfast and dinner, or perhaps the best way to tie my velcro shoes? At this point I'm no longer thinking that I'm the one that needs help, and I'm ready to move on.
ME: Nevermind then. If you need a VIN instead of a vehicle make and model to tell me how many brake pads come in a box, I'll take my business elsewhere.
- Yeah, that'll show 'em! The old threat of losing business! In this economy, surely they'll be begging me to buy from them and showering me with apology...
THEM: Well, sir we are a crysler dealer, without the vin, we do not gurantee any item to be correct. most dealers that prefer to get it right the first time always request the vin, thank you.
- I really wanted to move on. I also wanted to teach him how to spell Chrysler and guarantee, but there was no time for that lesson, only retaliation (and maybe some exaggeration)!
ME: I don't have the vin readily available where I am right now. Your site also does not require me to enter a vin in order to find the part. It asks for year, make, and model. It's a simple question, how many brake pads come in the box if I order a quantity of 1?
Somebody walks in to your dealership and says "I need to buy front brake pads for a 2002 PT Cruiser." He didn't drive the car there and doesn't have the vin on him, but he knows the year, make, and model. How many would you sell him? Or would you tell him to go home and find the vin?
THEM: Sir, there are 3 different types, and if someone walks in here and asks for brakes we ask for a vin, also the website is not a site that we operate and is not a chrysler website it is a 3rd party website, the dealer site that all dealers use is alot different than the site you look at, and when you place an order it does ask for a vin, twice, there really is no reason for you to be rude, we just try to do our job correct, if I were to send you an incorrect quote or an incorrect part, you would then be very upset if you recieved the incorrect part, also, the brake pad kit comes with both sets of pads to do the front left and front right, rotors come as one to do one side, thank you.
- Not sure I've ever seen so many words strung together without a period, but anyway...
ME: Sorry if I sound rude, but you just answered my original question - how many sets of brake pads come in the kit. Didn't need a vin, didn't need to have 8 messages to get there. Had you simply answered something like "the brake pad kit comes with both sets of pads to do the front left and front right, rotors come as one to do one side, but be sure to provide your VIN for proper parts," I would have ordered them a week ago.
- Ok, so I'm being a condescending, forceful, rude, instructional asshole. Does that mean I'm wrong? Have we added fire to this feud? Will they just accept defeat and perhaps learn from their mistakes?
THEM: God bless you and have a great day.
- The world may never know...
ME: need to order new pads and rotors for my 02 PT. Can you confirm that I need to only order a quantity of 1 for the front pads to get a set for both front wheels? I plan to order 2 front rotors and 1 set of pads and I want to be sure I get what I need. I'm guessing that at $120, it's pads for both sides of the car.
- I thought this was a reasonable request, fairly simple, right? Here's the first response:
THEM: Hello, we would need the VIN number to locate this part. Thanks The xxxxmopar Team
- I don't feel the need to expose their name. I also don't see how a VIN number adds value to the question...so I start to get a little annoyed.
ME: VIN number? it's a 2002 PT Cruiser. Front pads quantity 1 includes pads for how many front wheels?
- Yes, I drive a PT Cruiser. Love it or hate it, that's me.
THEM: Sorry, we have requested the vin for proper information, the vin is the vehicle identification number, without that we cannot help you.
- Thanks for clarifying what VIN stands for. Could you also provide me with such elusive facts as what meal comes between breakfast and dinner, or perhaps the best way to tie my velcro shoes? At this point I'm no longer thinking that I'm the one that needs help, and I'm ready to move on.
ME: Nevermind then. If you need a VIN instead of a vehicle make and model to tell me how many brake pads come in a box, I'll take my business elsewhere.
- Yeah, that'll show 'em! The old threat of losing business! In this economy, surely they'll be begging me to buy from them and showering me with apology...
THEM: Well, sir we are a crysler dealer, without the vin, we do not gurantee any item to be correct. most dealers that prefer to get it right the first time always request the vin, thank you.
- I really wanted to move on. I also wanted to teach him how to spell Chrysler and guarantee, but there was no time for that lesson, only retaliation (and maybe some exaggeration)!
ME: I don't have the vin readily available where I am right now. Your site also does not require me to enter a vin in order to find the part. It asks for year, make, and model. It's a simple question, how many brake pads come in the box if I order a quantity of 1?
Somebody walks in to your dealership and says "I need to buy front brake pads for a 2002 PT Cruiser." He didn't drive the car there and doesn't have the vin on him, but he knows the year, make, and model. How many would you sell him? Or would you tell him to go home and find the vin?
THEM: Sir, there are 3 different types, and if someone walks in here and asks for brakes we ask for a vin, also the website is not a site that we operate and is not a chrysler website it is a 3rd party website, the dealer site that all dealers use is alot different than the site you look at, and when you place an order it does ask for a vin, twice, there really is no reason for you to be rude, we just try to do our job correct, if I were to send you an incorrect quote or an incorrect part, you would then be very upset if you recieved the incorrect part, also, the brake pad kit comes with both sets of pads to do the front left and front right, rotors come as one to do one side, thank you.
- Not sure I've ever seen so many words strung together without a period, but anyway...
ME: Sorry if I sound rude, but you just answered my original question - how many sets of brake pads come in the kit. Didn't need a vin, didn't need to have 8 messages to get there. Had you simply answered something like "the brake pad kit comes with both sets of pads to do the front left and front right, rotors come as one to do one side, but be sure to provide your VIN for proper parts," I would have ordered them a week ago.
- Ok, so I'm being a condescending, forceful, rude, instructional asshole. Does that mean I'm wrong? Have we added fire to this feud? Will they just accept defeat and perhaps learn from their mistakes?
THEM: God bless you and have a great day.
- The world may never know...
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